In my last post I talked about getting your needs met, but what if you are a step behind and you are not even sure if your needs are or aren’t being met.
The first place to start is to be able to identify the signs that your needs are not being met or that something is out of balance.
What does your life look like when you are unhappy? Take some time and sit down and write it out. I understand that there are events outside of your control that can make you unhappy, but what if there aren’t? And even if there are, you can handle them so much better when your needs are being met.
For example mine are
- My house will be untidy and I will have no motivation to clean or tidy up. I know it is cool and trendy to bash housework and make out it is something that we shouldn’t want to do but the reality is that when our houses are clean and tidy we do actually feel so much better, not in an obsessive way, but as with everything in life in a balanced way. I am an empath and feel the energies of people, buildings and areas that I am with and if my house is untidy and I have no motivation to do anything about it then it means that somewhere I am over giving, I am being overstretched, I am out of balance. When my home is clean and tidy, I feel so much better because the energy of my house is clean and sparkly and I am able to relax better in the comfort of my own home.
- I become oversensitive to comments people make, when this is happening it is not helpful to me or the people around me. Feeling upset by people’s comments can also be about boundaries and how you are letting people treat you, which is a whole nother article. I know that when this is happening I need to put myself in serious timeout, relax and get back to me and find out what the problem really is, because it is not usually what people are saying that is the issue. For me it is generally that I am not listening to myself about what I should and shouldn’t be doing, I have forgotten to listen to my inner compass.
- I want to eat comforting carbohydrates. Carbohydrates help release serotonin (the happy and calm hormone) so somewhere this plea is a cry for relaxation, a cry for a hug for something comforting. Even though food can be comforting it is all about whether you are eating to feel nutritionally wholesome or whether you are eating to hide your feelings. Find other things that are more nurturing to your soul and listen to why you are feeling so tired and in need of sustenance. What decisions can you make that can help you feel more relaxed, nurtured and supported.
So those are mine, what are yours?
I know when these things are happening I need to stop and look around me and listen, take time out to really really listen to what my needs are. Human beings make life very complex, but most of the time the answers are really simple. I know in my case that when I take the time to listen to myself I find that somewhere a part of me is wanting to communicate something profound and life changing to me, which is possibly why I resist stopping and listening to it in the first place.
If you would really like some help with listening to yourself and helping you to navigate your way back to happiness then contact me below. I run journaling courses and one to one coaching sessions to help you identify your needs and make your self care a priority.